Day 065

NEW BORN BABY

Ek bacha paida hote hi nurse

se bola – Mobile hai kya?

Nurse – Kya karega?

Bacha – Kuch nahin, Bhagwaan

ko call karna hai K mein theek

thaak pahunch gaya.

Patient doctor se – Aapne nurse

bahut achi rakhi hai, uska haath

lagte hi, mein theek ho gaya.

Doctor – Jaanta hoon, thappar ki

aawaaz yahaan taka aa rahi hai.

GANJU PANJU

Ganju – Mere 3 bete engineer ban gaye

lekin ek kambhakht daku ban gaya.

Panju – Toh usko ghar se nikaal do.

Ganju – Yehi toh problem hai, kambhakht

kamaakar bhi saala wahi aata hai.

SAPNA

Teacher – Maria,tera sapna kya hai?

Maria – Chaand par charna.

Teacher – Peter, tumhaara sapna?

Peter – Maria par charna.

CALL GIRL

Ek call girl ka janaaza nikla toh usse

dekhkar ek aadmi bola – Acha hua,

aakhir aapas mein dono mili toh sahi.

Doosre aadmi ne poocha – Kaun dono?

Pehle aadmi ne jawab diya-Uski taangein.

Day 064

KISMAT

 Kismat aazmaa chukka hoon

Taqdeer aazmaa raha hoon

Ik bewafa ki khatir

Ricksha chala raha hoon.

MAJNU KI HAALAT

Majnu ne laila se kaha, humco gale laga lo.

Majnu ne laila se kaha, humco gale laga lo.

Jab laila ka baap nazar aaya, toh kaha

Joote chappal theek kara lo.

AANKH

Woh aankh bari pyaari thi

Jo humne unhe maari thi

Woh sandal badi baari thi

Jo usne humein maari thi

Muft mein hi, pit gaye yaar

“Humein” toh aankh ki bimaari thi.

KAPRE

Usne utaari saari

Phir aayi petticoat ki baari

Blouse toh pehle hi diya tha utaar

Zyada excited mat ho yaar

Yeh tha kapre sukhaane ka taar.

DOUBLE MEANING

Usne kaha aur dabaao

Meine dabaaya

Usne kaha aur dabaao

Meine aur dabaaya

Usne kaha banyan nikaal do, phir dabaao

Meine phir dabaaya

Dekha, ho gaya na suitcase band.

Day 063

FM RADIO

Ek sindhi ne FM radio per

phone kiya aur kaha mujhe

kamaljit ka batua mila hai,

jismein 500 rupaiye pare hain.

Radio jockey-Toh aapko batua

kamaljit ko vaapas karna hai?

Sindhi man-Pagal ho kya, mujhe

unke liye ek dukhi gaane ki
farmaaish karni hai.

RAAVAN

Raavan-Cigarette hai kya?

Hanumaan-Nahin.

Ram-Ek packet hai na, de do.

Hanumaan-Aap chup rahiye

prabhuji, saale ke 10 sir hain,

poora packet khatam kar dega.

MEDICAL STORE

Ek aadmi doctor se-Aap parchi

mein aisa kya likhte ho, jo sirf

medical store wale ko hi samaj

aata hai.

Doctor- Mein likhta hoon, meine

loot liya hai,tu bhi loot le.

COLLEGE

College girl fees counter par

khari thi, fees clerk se boli-

Sir le lo na.

Clerk- Do minute ruko, aaraam

se loonga.

Larki-Arre jaldi le lo. Phir nahin
de paaoongi, mera period shuru

hone wala hai.

CAR

Ek larki ke T.shirt pe car bani

hui thi.Ek bacha usse lagaataar dekh

raha tha.

Larki ne bache ko ghoorkar-Kabhi car

nahin dekhi kya?

Bacha-Dekhi hai, par itne bade(Big)

speed braker nahin dekhe.

Day 062

GIRLFRIEND

Boyfriend ne apni girlfriend ko park

mein bulaaya.

Woh der se aayi toh sher sunaya.

Falak pe sitaaron ko neend aa rahi hai,

Doosri ka time ho gaya aur tu ab aa rahi hai.

SHAADI KA SUKH

Subah garam paani milega

(Bartan done ke liye).

Bache milenge

(Gadhaa ban ne ke liye).

Biwi aapse pyar se bolegi

(Raashan ke liye).

SHAAYARI

Arz kiya hai

Woh bewafa hain toh kya hua,

Bura mat kaho usse.

Woh bewafa hain toh kya hua,

Bura mat kaho usse

Doosri set karo aur dafa karo usse.

BLOOD DONATION

A guy donated blood to his girlfriend.

When they broke up, he wanted his

blood back.

The girl threw a bloody kotex at him

and said, I will pay you in monthly

instalments.

DAHEJ

1970 mein – Dulha dahej mein sasurji se

TV maangta tha.

1980 mein – Motor cycle.

1990 mein – Plot.

2000 mein – AC & Car.

2010 mein– Bas seal pack dulhan de,

baaki mein kama loonga.

Day 061

SHEILA KI JAWANI

Machli jal ki rani hai,

Jeevan uska paani hai,

Munni ab puraani hai,

Yaaron ab toh Sheila ki jawani hai.

RAAVAN

Ek din raavan disco mein gaya

aur wahaan jaakar behosh ho

gaya.  Kyun?

Wahaan gate par likha tha,

“ Entry fee Rs. 500 per head.”

ZULFEIN

Teri zulfon mein kho jaana chaahata hoon,

Teri zulfon mein kho jaana chaahata hoon,

Per tu tel hi itna lagaati ho,

K har baar fisal jaata hoon.

DULHAN

Nayi dulhan ko dulhe ne suhaagraat

pe muhn dikhaai ke 25000 rupaiye

diye.

Dulhan itne saare paise dekhkar ghabra

ke boli-Suno ji, poora khaandaan thokega

kya?

SARDAR

Do sardar aapas mein-

Pehla sardar-Mujhse panga na le,

mein sher da puttar hoon.

Doosra sardar-Yaar, ek baat toh bata,

sher ghar aaya tha, ya auntie jungle

gayi thee.