Day 155

GADHA (DONKEY)

Pati: Arre, munne ko samjaao,

zid kar raha hai ke gadhe par

baithoonga.

Patni: Toh kya hua, bacha hi toh hai,

zara si der ke liye bitha kyun nahin lete?

MILK

Statistics of breast milk:

1-No need to insert the sugar.

2-No need to boil it.

3-Cats cannot steal it.

4-It’s tax free.

5-It has no expiry date.

6-Available in beautiful packing.

7-Buy one and get one free.

Joke submitted, courtesy of: Francis

MARRIAGE

What a married man says after years

of marriage.

My marriage is made of Trust & Understanding.

She does not trust me & I don’t understand her.

DULHA

Shaadi ek aisa din hai jab larka stage par

apni dulhan ke saath baithe hue doosri

khoobsurat larkiyon ko dekhta hai aur

sochta hai: Sab aaj se pehle, kahaan mar

gayee theen.

HUSBAND WIFE

Husband asking his wife in bed:

Thora oopar, ab left, itna nahin,

Thora right hoke peeche.

Wife: Are you f#cking me or parking?

Joke submitted, courtesy of: Ravi

Day 154

MOBILE

Larki: Mujhe kitna pyar karte ho?

Larka: Mera dil mobile hai aur tum

uska sim card ho.

Larki: Hey bhagwan, mein kitni lucky hoon.

Larka: Thank God, usse pata nahin ke

mera mobile dual sim ka hai.

ENGINEER

A policeman arrested a prostitute

in the hospital area and asked her

profession.

Prostitute: I am Social Engineer.

Policeman: What do you do?

Prostitute: I Build & Destroy erections.

Joke submitted, courtesy of : John

SANTA BANTA

Santa: Tu mirror ke saamne baithkar

kyun parta hai?

Banta: 3 faayde hain.

1-Saath mein revision ho jata hai.

2-Khud par nazar bhi rehti hai.

3-Parne ke liye, company mil jaati hai.

LARKA LARKI

Ek larki ko dekhkar, ek larka bola,

stop, I can PK.

Larki: What is PK?

Larka: Propose Karoonga.

Tabi larki boli: FSSSM.

Larka: What is FSSSM?

Larki: Fut saala, sandal se maaroongi.

CANCER

Santa goes to hospital for periodic check up.

Doctor: “You have cancer in P@nis.”

Santa goes and beats his wife and shouts:

“I told you to stop smoking.”
Joke submitted, courtesy of : John

Day 153

NURSERY CLASS STUDENT

Ek nursery class ka bacha bola:

Mam, mein aapko kaisa lagta hoon?

Mam: So sweet.

Bacha apne saath baithe hue larke

se bola: Dekha, meine kaha tha na,

line maarti hai.

BANIYA

A baniya do s@x on alternate days.

His friend asks: Why not you do

regularly?

Baniya replies: Kya karein, ek din toh

condom sukhaane mein bhi lag jaata hai.

Joke submitted, courtesy of: Hassan

TEACHER

Teacher: Saal mein kitne mahine hote hain?

Larka: 12

Teacher: Bahut acha, tumhe kaise pata?

Larka: 12 mahine mein, 12 tarikon se,

Tujhko pyar jataaoonga re,

Dhink chikka, dhink chikka, dhink chikka.

LARKA LARKI

Larka larki se: Tumhari kameez fati hui hai.

Larki: Nahin, yeh fashion hai.

Larka: Acha, khud faro toh fashion,

Hum farein toh police station.

DELIVERY

Doctor to Female: Kya aap delivery ke

time, bache ke pita ko pass dekhna chaahogi?

Female: Nahin, unhe mere pati pasand nahin karte.

Day 152

MONDAY, 18 JUNE 2012

TEACHER

Teacher: Paani mein rehne wale

5 jeev jantu ke naam batao.

Panju: Mendak.

Teacher: 4 aur batao.

Panju: Mendak ki mummy, mendak

ka papa, mendak ki behen aur

mendak ki item.

CHAAND

Sir: Angrezon ne chaand par

paani aur baraf ki khoj kar li hai.

Bataao is se tumne kya seekha?

Pappu: Bas humein ab sirf daaru

aur namkeen leke jaana hai.

MOTHER AND SON

A little boy was so jealous of his

new born brother, he put poison

on mom’s nipple while she was

asleep.

The next day their driver died.

Joke submitted, courtest of : Adam

SANTA BANTA

Santa aur Banta 8^th mein aathveen

baar fail ho gaye.

Banta: Chal, suicide kar lein.

Santa: Saale, paagal ho gaya hai.

Agle janam phir nursery se hi shuru

karna parega.

TWO GIRLFRIENDS

1^st Girfriend: What do you get when

you have s@x with a judge, banker,

and architect?

2^nd Girlfriend:

Judge-Honourable discharge

Banker-Premature withdrawal

Architect-illegal erection.

SUNDAY HOLIDAY